New Feature Release: Reality Filters

April 1, 2024

Do you want to know what is too great a burden to bear? Reality. Not anymore. We are thrilled to announce that we have brought to life one of the most requested features of all time: Reality Filters. Instead of wasting our time with more streaming services, shows, and other nonsense like closed captioning improvements, we’ve been making these state-of-the-art filters for reality.

That’s right. Now, you don’t have to deal with any of your problems. Someone else’s lack of perfection is not your problem. It’s your way or not today. Someone using big words unnecessarily in a conversation, and now you’re not feeling like the smartest person in the room? No, thank you. Are you having to face the consequences of your own actions? Unsubscribe from that. Are people yelling about their food order being wrong? Sir, this is a Wendy’s. With VidAngel, everyone’s the appropriate amount of nice, your pillow is always cold, and your fries stay fresh. Or maybe you’re one for chaos, and in your perfect world, everyone’s yelling profanities, and wet socks are abundant. 

Because here at VidAngel ignorance is bliss, it’s celebrated. And frankly, a lack of ignorance is just downright irresponsible. Got a problem? Don’t want to deal with someone acting human? With VidAngel, you don’t have to face reality–and we’re better for it.

Some of the reality filters include, but are not limited to:

  • Potty training
  • Sticker residue
  • The feeling of chalk
  • Cold fries
  • Jeans
  • Buffering
  • Wet Socks
  • 2am thoughts about the location of your birth certificate 
  • FB Memories of statuses past you posted from 10 years ago 
  • J-Lo
  • Slow walkers
  • Misuse of they’re, their, there
  • Lack of spatial awareness
  • People who talk during movies
  • Pineapple on pizza
  • People who crowd the airport gate
  • The word “literally” figuratively
  • Cryptic quotes people post on social, detailed posts with first-and-last names only
  • People taking calls on the speakerphone
  • When people act like people
  • Paper straws
  • People overstaying their welcome
  • The term “cool beans”
  • People who stand in the middle of the escalator
  • Open-toed shoes
  • Loud chewing
  • Emails from your coworker with your boss CC’d
  • Empty containers in the fridge
  • Missing one sock
  • Jake Gyllenhaal (Swifties understand this all too well)
  • When there are 384 stalls available, and they pick the one next to you
  • Mouth Breathers
  • Past you making plans that present you doesn’t want to commit to
  • Sleep regressions
  • Line cutters
  • People who break out in song for no reason whatsoever
  • Clapping when the plane lands
  • Christmas music
  • Mother-in-laws
  • Other drivers
  • Bright lights
  • Slow internet
  • People who don’t cover their mouth when they cough
  • Hashtags, all of them
  • People who don’t know how to get through airport security efficiently
  • Twilight Series
  • Loud phone games
  • When people don’t text you back
  • When people do text you back
  • When you’re walking on a path, and a person is coming in the opposite direction and is occupying 80% of the path
  • Other people’s children
  • Crumbs
  • When people eat your leftovers
  • People who stand too close to you in the check-out line
  • Leftovers

And so many more…

Stop running away from your problems; just skip them with VidAngel. Have a filter request? Please email us @ realityisnoneofmybusiness@youretheproblemnotme.com

Topics: April Fools' DayTagged ,
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